Have I blogged about Paula Dean yet? If not, that southern phenom deserves at least one blog mention. She has worked miracles in our kitchen using my hands and her brain. Her creation called, “Herb Stuffed Chicken” caused a party in my mouth not seen since New Years Eve 1999 (and his name was…oh just kidding, my mom reads this thing) Anyhow, seriously it was so great. I made it last night and just feasted on the leftovers, savoring every bite. Praise God for chefs around the world who make deliciousness a somewhat easily attainable task for the non-chefs such as yours truly.

Chandra (can’t do that cool thing where I make her name light up and it takes you right to her blog, look on my blog list under “Watching them grow”) tagged me. I tried starting last night but that’s a hard list to come up with! I’ll try again but I wanted to thank her for keeping my mind off Tariku for a bit.

One more thing before I do the “8 Things”. Last night at about 6:30 we (Families adopting from Ethiopia through our agency) got word that the US Embassy in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia has “requested” that we discontinue any contact with our childrens’ birth family. As many of you know, this is one of the reasons Zach and I were excited about Ethiopia…there was a possibility (and it was always just that, there was never any promises our birth family would come to meet us) of meeting Tariku’s birth family, or rather any surviving that CHSFS could find. There are also people who have already adopted and were going through CHS’s post-adoption process that were remaining in contact with the birth families. CHSFS isn’t elaborating why, but I truly trust that they are doing what’s best for the children RIGHT NOW and for the families they are representing.

Obviously this is a huge setback. It’s been proven that contact with birth family has been an enormous benefit for adopted children as they grow older. CHS has reiterated their beliefs that it is in the best interest OF THE CHILD (who we are most concerned about) that we are able to meet and stay in contact with birth family. However, I know that there are probably reasons unbeknownst to us why this is happening. After seeing many programs/countries fall too easily to unethical practices (i.e. Guatemala, etc) I am ever so thankful Ethiopia is doing everything it can to continue ethical international adoptions. If something has to be “cut off” in order to maintain ethical practices, I am all for that. I realized after thinking about it for awhile and talking it out with Zach, one of the main reasons I wanted to meet birth family was also a bit selfish. I wanted to see what they looked like, would Tariku have his/her eyes, his/her height, etc. I wanted to know details about them, Tariku as a baby, etc. Of course I would go on to share these details with Tariku, but a lot of it would be for me. In the end, I am trusting the organization I chose to keep us informed of any latest news and pray that at some point they will open contact back up so we can get in touch with them once Tariku is home with us.

On to more lighter fare…8 Things

8 Things I’m passionate about:
1. Zach
2. Trysten, Tariku, Dailah
3. My family
4. My friends
5. Body PUMP/ working out
6. Africa
7. God (He really is first, but after I had typed a few, it was too hard to go and fix it)
8. Life

8 Things I want to do before I die:

1. Be married to my husband for record-setting number of years
2. Raise healthy, self-confident, fantastic kids
3. Go to Ethiopia at least 5 times
4. Be on American Gladiators or Amazing Race (with my #1 man)
5. Go on a honeymoon with Zach
6. Start my own business
7. Make a REAL impact in one random persons life
8. Do some extreme sport just to say I did

8 Things I Often say:

1. I Love You
2. Thank You
3. Give me 2 more (I’m a personal trainer for goodness sakes!)
4. Seriously?
5. Mmm. Not so much
6. Stotle, No! (the dog)
7. Zach, Trysten, Tariku, Dailah
8. Hello

TV Shows I recently watched (Like you, Chandra, we don’t have cable):

1. Biggest Loser
2. American Gladiators
3. American Idol
4. Amazing Race
5. Ellen Degeneres
6. October Road
7. The news
8. House

8 Songs I could listen to over and over (these will be dancing songs cuz I feel like dancin’):

1. Dangerously in Love, Destiny’s Child
2. Christmas music, anything
3. Anything my hubby plays/sings on the guitar
4. Bringing Sexy Back, JT
5. To Make you feel my Love, Garth Brooks
6. Love shack
7. I cant’ think of others, it’s too early
8.

8 Things that attract me to my best friends

1. humor
2. loyalty
3. honesty
4. passion
5. minds (the way they think)
6. optimism
7. the way they love me
8. trust

8 Things I’ve learned or been reminded of this past year:

1. I love my husband/ kids sooo much
2. My ability to love ANYONE is not bound by blood
3. Kids don’t care if the house is messy or in disarray, they only care if you haven’t played with them in 15 minutes
4. If anyone hurts someone I love, mama bear comes out and I’m scared of HER
5. Sometimes (sometimes it’s all the time) laughter really is the best medicine
6. if you have a good marriage, everything in life is rosier
7. reading books is a passion of mine that is always there whether i’ve read the last few days/months or not
8. good friends/family can carry you through ANYTHING

8 People I’m tagging:

1. Leslie
2. Jody
3. Tony (if you have time, you are heading to ET in a few days, afterall)
4. Cousin Amy
5. Cassie
6. Kait (but you must do yours in both Spanish and English)
7. Erica (of course!) 🙂
8. Barb

Again…I’m so happy for my friends on the forum with travel dates…BUT

The people who got their referral the same week we got ours are traveling February 7th (the day of our court appearance of course).

Today is a pity party. I’m mourning all the possibilites of what could have and should have been. They are counting down the days until they can describe, in detail, how their kids smell and laugh. I can *only* hope for the word that he is ours (that is a HUGE *only*, I’m really excited for that, but…you know the rest)

Pity party for Tesi day..where’s the darn cookie dough? Is 3PM too early for a glass (or two) of wine? Jody you interested? 🙂

What is music to my ears you may ask? The contractors and their work. Sure, there may be cursing (there’s not, but there might be soon) but there is also progress and I don’t mind one if I get the other.

Today at 6:45 Dailah gave TT his wake up call, “TT, TT, TT” she was yelling. Finally I hear, “Okay, Dailah, TT’s up, let me go potty first.” Then they commenced to playing.

Point to consider…is “blogging” the “texting” of our generation? (I know people of our generation text, but I don’t, I blog) Just something I was thinking about.

Off to PUMP!

1) Someone had posted a comment earlier about wanting more info about our adoption group at church. It was anonymous, so not sure who it was. But whoever…We have started an adoption/foster care group every Sunday at 10:30 after church. It’s just a place we can go to for support, information, etc. Jody and I haven’t completely got it figured out where we want it to go but it’s been great so far! If you have any questions, definitely ask a little bit more!

2) We are officially moved in downstairs. You guys should get excited about seeing these pics. It reminds me of a college dorm. Zach commented that he’s never sat so close to the TV, I would agree. But overall, it’s exciting because tomorrow at 7:30 we should hear our door bell sing “Take me out to the ballgame” and when I open the door it shall be contractors. Yippee!

Kinda can’t get enough of American Gladiators. I just can’t help but think I could kick some tail at this thing. I think it has something to do with the self confidence instilled in me as a child (thanks mom and dad!) Is it sad that I’ve been “pressuring” Zach into getting a Gladiator rink at Camp? I think the kids would LOVE it!

It’s about this point in winter, Christmas is over, New Year’s is over, snow and visible breaths have lost their luster…this point in winter I wish I was anywhere but Iowa. This year, I’m wishing for somewhere warmer, somewhere in Africa, oh yeah, that’s right, that’s ETHIOPIA. I REALLY wish I was in Ethiopia today. I wish I was there, holding Tariku, telling him a story. Not an important story, just any story. If I’m telling him just any story that means we’ve “known” each other for a few days by now and we’ve stopped staking such importance on every word, every hug, every kiss.

I’m ready to just be Tariku’s mommy. I love being a mommy. In fact, I never knew that being a mommy would be so wonderfully fulfilling. I didn’t know any of this. Now I do, that’s why I’m 100% positive I’m ready to do it again with Tariku. Though I may not be completely ready for everything that comes with adopting a 3-year-old, I think I’m as ready as I can be. I’ve tipped my big toe in the water and I’m ready to dive in; with no limits, get the hair wet, mascara running down the face. Shoulder deep in mothering Tariku, that’s where I want to be.

17 days…17 days until the Ethiopian courts will pronounce Zach and Tesi Klipsch as mother and father of Tariku Asamu. I can’t wait to get word of that. By just as my friend, Jody, is struggling with, even when I’m pronounced his mother, I can’t actually mommy him for a few weeks after that.

We, as mommys, are used to our hearts living outside our bodies. To cry when we hear how a kid beat up our child (someone did to Trysten today), to fight the big battles, the small battles, the insignificant battles, all of that. To kiss the tears away, give big congratulatory hugs, say prayers, eat *white* snow. This is a mommy. A mommy, for all intents and purposes, cannot be a mommy on paper alone. A mommy gets knee deep in poo, throw up, mud, gross bath water. A mommy is just…there. Getting the birth certificate with Zach and my names as Tariku’s parents will be huge, there’s no doubt; but it doesn’t make me any more of a mommy to him. I have a feeling February 7th will pass, Tariku will be ours and he will be none the wiser. The 7th will look a lot like the 5th and the 6th to him. He doesn’t know he just gained another mommy and a daddy. But when I get there, when I hold him and (oy) sing to him, rock him to sleep. Then he will know I am his mommy. He may not feel for me like he did for his amaye, but he will know I am what a mommy should feel like.

All this is to say I really wish I could get past the “mother” and get straight to the “mommy” with my Tariku.

My brother (in-law) just announced his engagement to one Emily Mally. He called tonight to say, “I am engaged to be married”. I couldn’t be happier.

When he (Frank, my BIL) and I used to meet over coffee and bagels we would imagine who he would end up with. Truth be told I never pictured someone like Emily. She’s “normal” compared to the ones I had him pegged with. I love my brother, don’t get me wrong. But I always pictured someone with more armpit hair and less in common with me (at least on the surface). But when I first met Emily, and saw how she and Frank interacted, they just fit. I couldn’t be more excited about her joining our family.

As many of you know, there are few responsibilities I take more seriously and with such joy as that of a sister. I’m so excited to be expanding my sisterly brood with Emily. She will fit in better than anyone I could’ve pictured. Are you all wanting to see the announcement? To really catch the humor you have to know both Frank and Emily but you should get a healthy chuckle either way. Without further ado…my brother, Frank and (soon-to-be) sister, Emily.

The title (in case you were interested) comes from one of my cousins when he was about 5-years-old (he’s now 16, jeesch). Anyway, my other cousin and I were playing with him, having him run around, etc. He finally stops, fed up with us ordering around and states, “I’m exhaustapated”. Well, I feel like my dear cousin Wardie Paul today.

Firstly, don’t get excited about tomorrow. The contractors said they couldn’t start until Tuesday…and so it begins. Anyhow, we moved more stuff downstairs. I’m going to take some pictures so you can see how ridiculous the house looks right now. Mostly because of how much stuff we have crammed into such tight quarters. All signs point to having to move our other set of couches up to Zach’s office because it just won’t fit.

It was kind of a wake up call, if I must say. Today’s message at church was “where your stuff is, there too is your heart” in a nutshell. Well, it appears our hearts have been in stuff for quite some time the way we’ve hoarded it. When I was in the corporate world I’d constantly complain that I never had anything to wear. Today I was putting my dress clothes in bins so I could make room in Dailah’s closet for the stuff I wear on a daily basis. I filled 2 HUGE bins. I looked up at the closet and it’s literally exploding with clothes, not to mention I have 2 other HUGE bins filled with workout clothes and sweaters. Wowsa. My mind hurts, my heart hurts and my fingers hurt.

Regardless of what I’ve learned today it’s ended on a positive…we moved both kids into the same room so we could have a room to ourselves. Right now I hear them giggling themselves to sleep. Music to my exhaustapated ears.

We worked out today, Zach came to my PUMP class, he’s so supportive I could squeeze him. When we got home we all got 2 hour naps, classic and amazing. Moved some stuff from upstairs to downstairs. Then pretty much just relaxed. I can’t remember the last time I felt so relaxed. It’s been -15 degrees outside so we thought today would be a good day to be hermits. Now I’m researching what my next tattoo will be. I have an idea, but am wanting to just look at my options. I’m sure this news will be met with equal parts sadness and disappointment to my uncle Vic. 🙂

Tomorrow will be our second Sunday meeting with the adoption group at church. Jody and I are excited and surprised by the amount of people at our church who are either going through or interested in adoption/foster care. I am selfishly hoping more will see how absolutely gratifying adoption can be. Did I mention I love Tariku so much my heart hurts? What does it say about me that I want everyone in the world to feel this jumble of emotions that is adoption? I guess it all comes down to the amazingness that is motherhood. The ups and downs..wouldn’t trade it for a thing in this world.

Hubby is home, Trysten is watching cartoons (pardon us, mommy and daddy needed a little catch up time), Dailah is sleeping, the computer is back in my arms. Things are as they should be…with the obvious exception of Tariku. He is not where he should be right now and that makes me more and more sad each day.

Just a few days and the house destruction will commence. This morning one of the Camp’s staff rang our door bell, knocked on the door and 2 seconds later (I didn’t have enough time to hop off the couch and answer the door that is about 15 feet away) he just walks right in with three other guys. Did I mention I’m excited to have this place a “home” rather than just another camp building?

Nothing insightful today, just had to make a note of how I took a deep breath today, let my shoulders relax and knew it was okay. Zach is back and Tariku will be soon.

I had one of the most fun last couple days with Zach. I don’t know why, but we were just really having lots of fun, being all lovey, etc. We were THAT couple that makes every other couple green with envy and I must admit it felt great. (In total honesty, we’re kinda that couple all the time, but what can you do?) Anyhow, we were talking about how we were going to miss each other this week. He says, “Hons, you are such hot property” (by the way, remember I am a feminist, so he said this in the most adoring way)”You’re like my Boardwalk, actually you’re my Boardwalk AND Park Place.” Believe me, it was precious. I’ve said before how I think he’s the funniest man in the world, so it was absolute classic Zach for him to describe his love for me in terms of the board game Monopoly. Reason #15,000,000 why I love the guy.